Another Contest

Cause one contest is never enough--the more you enter the more you win. Or the harder you make the judges work to pick someone else. Something like that.


This week, we have this dealio going on over at Brenda Drake Writes . . . under the influence of coffee.

Post the first 250 words of your story, get some reactions (hopefully) and post some comments for others. Then submit the entry via email.

So away we go!

Name: Wes Ford
Title: A Spoil of Wishes
Genre: Contemporary Fantasy

Melalain watched in silence as her apprentice toiled away at his work. He was still young—How old had he said? Twelve years? She had lived too long to be aware of age anymore—but quite capable. His current project was not something a first-year apprentice could usually handle, but he was deft at the art of carnomancy. It wasn’t a particularly dangerous assignment, either. There was only a small chance that it could be fatal.

She monitored his progress from the observation balcony that circled the workshop. His hands danced through the proper patterns and his voice intoned the ancient words of power. He was doing very well so far, and a smile touched the witch’s face.

      He was a curiosity, this new apprentice. Lorian Mickaya, the child of a Djinn and a dryad. Any Djinn-child would make a rare and worthy apprentice, but the combination of the bloodlines made him unique. Some day Lorian would complete his apprenticeship and take his father’s place as the Djinn—a granter of wishes, a shaper of reality in a fashion—but he had to stay alive until such a time that he could protect himself. His father, for all of his power, hadn’t been able to.

       He drew the ceremonial knife across his chest, a single gash in the flesh above the heart, drawn deeply. He didn’t even winced from the pain. He just held the knife over the cauldron to let the blood dripped into the bubbling mixture.

        Thick, scarlet vapor exploded from the cauldron, swallowing his rhythmic chant with a menacing hiss.

Wes

will note that he did a little editing to his beginning based on some of the other feedback he had received earlier. Thanks, again!

Sample pages: Prologue or Chapter 1?

Blog post number 2!  How many do I need before I count as an official blogger?  I guess if I stay consistent through to June, I can call myself that.  If I want to.  Do I want to?

Anyway, on to the point of this rambling. When sending sample pages along with a query (some agents request "the first X pages" and the X seems to be 5 or 10), do I send the very first pages (i.e., the Prologue) or the beginning of the story (which I think of as Chapter 1)?

I'm curious about this because I have different opinions about my Prologue and my Chapter 1.  I think both are really good--not trying to be arrogant, here, I'm just pointing out I'm not sending something I think is less than good--but they have different points.

The Prologue has a faster pace and reveals some of the history of the important characters, but it isn't told from the perspective of the main character from whom most of the narrative is seen. The book can be read without the Prologue, and it will make complete sense and be a whole story.  Some parts of it will make more sense and be a bit clearer, however, if the Prologue is read.

Chapter 1 has a slower pace as the main character is developed (not overly) and her voice is shown.  She has a bit of slower build up to show where she is coming from before the action/twist starts later in the chapter.  I have reworked this section over and over to keep it from being too slow.  I can point out all the reasons I think the info is important and in the best pace/arrangement; of course, I'm not there with readers to point that out while they are reading, so it is kind of a moot point (or a moo point...like a cow's opinion: it doesn't matter).


So that leaves me with the question, which is the best to send: the Prologue or Chapter 1?  I can't help but think Chapter 1, since that is the true meat of the story.

And I do like my beginning.  I just worry that it might not have the suck-you-in it needs for an agent to ask for more pages. Guess I'll find out if I actually get asked for pages, huh?  Trial by fire.

Wes
is going to get burned.