Friday, April 1, 2011

Blogfests I'm Not Entering

I've been seeing this A-Z April Writing fest mentioned on various blogs. I will not be participating. I don't yet have the blogging endurance for such a challenge.
The pitch challenge is pretty good: write a pitch sentence Twitter style. 140 characters. I'm not signing up for it because of the editing I'm doing; I no longer considering my manuscript complete (woe that I sent out queries earlier this month saying otherwise). But it is always a good exercise. I'll post that next time when I've prepared for it a bit.

Instead, I shall post a small snippet of my manuscript-back-in-progress. I actually had a reversal on one of my previous "sacred cows", the book never being from Lorian's point of view. I decided there could be one exception, the Prologue. My strategy for tackling the new beginning of the book was to start at the exact life-altering moment for both of the main characters, Lorian and Shae.

Lorian's Big Bad Defining Moment, the thing that plunges him into the story, is very different and happens much earlier then Shae's. (And his moment leads to her moment, but that isn't revealed until the end, so shhhhh!). I made that the Prologue. Shae is still the main voice of the book; her Big Bad Defining Moment is the moment in which Lorian first enters her life...sort of (as in, this is only sort of the first time he has entered her life, not it is sort of her Big Bad Defining Moment--jeez, I should have called it something else, that is getting to be a lot to type!--cause it definitely is the Big Bad Defining Moment).

So here it is, paragraph 1 of the Prologue (still in progress):

Lorian knew for a fact his father was dead: He was holding his father's soul in his hands. It happened just like his father said it would, the energy swelling around him--the feeling as though his father was holding him one last time, comforting him, saying goodbye--before it coalesced in into a glowing ball. This was his father’s last gift to him--his inheritance. All Lorian had to do was accept it, and he would become the next Djinn.

And there we have it. That is Lorian's moment: his father died. That moment sets the action for Lorian. That drives him, and everything he does through in the book comes about because of this death.

Wes
is still editing this, of course, but that's where he is now. 

4 comments:

Juliana L. Brandt said...

I actually like this first paragraph than the one you posted a while ago. My only thought, the colon should be taken out and the word 'because' added in.

Are you looking for someone to do edits? Or do you have enough critique partners lined up :)

Juliana L. Brandt said...

Shoot, missed the word 'better' above.

Wes said...

I don't actually have any critique partners lined up yet. I still need to put on my editor hat and go back everything a few times before I'm even at that stage.

Glad you think it is better! So far, I think the change to the beginning has been a big improvement, but it is echoing throughout the whole story, so it is taking some time to adjust things as necessary.

Juliana L. Brandt said...

Well, let me know when you reach that point and are in need of some outsider comments!